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AMERICA YOU SUCK
Okay I know this is a very stupid thing to say in the middle of my A levels, but.
OH GOD WHY?!?! AMERICANS RUIN EVERYTHING BRITISH. EVERYTHING EUROPEAN, ACTUALLY. OMG OMG OMG.
I AM TALKING ABOUT MOVIES. I AM TALKING ABOUT CULTURAL HEROES. I AM TALKING ABOUT FRIGGING SHERLOCK HOLMES.
I am also thinking about The Dark Is Rising and how it became an enormously stupid, self-centred American piece of crap, but yes. You get the idea.
LOOK, FOOLS. WILL IS NOT AMERICAN. HIS BROTHER IS A MARINE IN THE BRITISH CORPS, NOT A HIPPIE. HOLMES IS A MISOGYNISTIC, SMUG, INTELLIGENT BASTARD WHO TOTALLY HATES EVERYONE UNLESS THEY'RE BRINGING HIM A DIFFICULT, INTERESTING CASE. OR WATSON. I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE HE'S GAY. WHATEVER. POINT IS. HE IS NOT LIKE, IRONMAN. HE DOESN'T DIVE OUT OF WINDOWS AND INTO DOCKS. HE DOES NOT STARE AT NAKED WOMEN.
In short, do not fall under the mistaken belief that everything can be made better with more naked women and more action. It gets boring! And I mean, there are movies for that! Why do you have to mix it into a detective movie! What, you're going to make Poirot a chippendale dancer now!? I mean I know that James Bond is a brit, but there are Limits. And they don't go to infinity, okay, shut up.
Okay yes I'm sorry everyone. Bye!
piss off! at 02:37 p.m.Tuesday, November 17, 2009 splash
Actually when I think about it, I really miss acting.
Two kinds of people, right?
People, and actors.
Goodnight world.
piss off! at 01:08 a.m.Tuesday, November 3, 2009 Crashing time
So, I crashed RJC today. It was pretty hilarious!
Most people didn't realise that there was a random other school person, because I was In Disguise. Because I wanted to go into their library, which is as gl as ours and doesn't let in people who aren't in full uniform. What.
WHO THE HELL COMES BACK TO SCHOOL IN FULL U TO STUDY?! I only wear full u when there's some reason for it. Like, mock papers. Except that I realised that there was no need anyway. So virtually never. Anyway their system can be defeated the exact same way, which is to wear a jacket. Wow, librarians.
Anyway yeah it was great. Most people ignored me and assumed that I was some random person, while the people who DID know me (and, consequently, knew that I should definitely not be here OR be in RJ half-uniform attire) freaked out.
I think Daryl Tan is still somewhere, thinking that I transferred in HAHAHA. Daniel.. hopefully does not, or else I will be very sad about the quality of Dean's List people in RJC.
Oh I didn't beat anyone up to steal their clothes. I wore an RJ shirt I borrowed from my sister (she's in RGSS. They sold it during ORA.) and a skirt I borrowed from nicole. And I wore contacts, so I looked even less noticeable.
Nothing much to say about actual mugging; basically the exact same thing in a different location. Chem today.
RJC school food is.... okay I guess. The noodle stall is not bad. Um their drinks are BIGGER but healthier (cough no pearls, guys! Sad right. But maybe that's why their sports teams pwn us) and have less variety!
After that I went to ISLAND CREAMERY which was great and excellent and has great ice cream. Also a camwhore kind of place. I'd elaborate, but I'm very tired.
Next week I'm going back to RJC. I wanted to see the art exhibits but the art gallery was closed -_- I happened to see Claire, so I asked her about it. Afterwards, I smsed her to ask if I could see her film. And she said yes. So okay I have to drag my sorry carcass back down to Bishan again.
But I want to see it. I think this time I might forgo the disguise though. Ah it depends. If I linger to mug after that then I might have to, unless I end up stoning in the canteen.
Okay I've to go sleep. I'm.. dying. Seriously. My eyes hurt and my brain is sleepy. Bye, you all.
piss off! at 11:01 p.m.Thursday, October 29, 2009 I will one day figure out how to fry insects on sight
Oh my god I hate insects so much. SO. MUCH. You can't begin to imagine how much I hate them T_T
(Side note: this means that I really hope that any future room mates are all Fearless Insect Fighters or something, as in, people who fight insects, not insects who are fighters, because if not BOTH OF US WILL END UP DYING THE MOMENT A COCKROACH INVADES.)
ANYWAY I was doing chem peacefully when a moth flew into my room. Fine. Whatever. Moth, we can coexist! I was mildly irritated by the way it kept fainting (from a height) onto my table then suddenly reviving and flapping insanely, though. But I was too lazy to catch it and throw it out again. So I ignored it.
... a decision which came back to bite me in the ass. Not literally, despite the fact that we are talking about bugs.
I happened to look up in the middle of my paper to observe the moth on my dresser. Thing to note: my dresser is covered in this cloth thingie to keep dust off or something, so the moth was on this vertical plane of rough cloth. To my vague distress, the weirdo bug was making suspiciously pornographic movements against my cloth. And I was like ?????? IS IT HUMPING MY DRESSER?! but I decided, um, whatever!! Be strange by yourself, bug! I don't touch that particular section, um, ever, so it's all right if you have strange preferences!
... some time later, after I'd finished my paper and was looking around, I happened to glance at that spot. And I froze. Because there was a white patch. And I was like OMGWTFBBQQQQQ IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT IS????? --- which is in retrospect, irrational, because I don't think insects work like that, but anyway. So I poked it with my pen, on the basis that if it really IS gross moth.. um, fluids, my pen is not an extension of me, no matter how literally one takes metaphors about the twinning of writing and soul.
As it turned out, it was helluva worse. THEY WERE EGGS GODDAMN IT. EGGS. I HATE EGGS. OF ANY SORT! I HATE CAVIAR! I HATE FISH ROE! I HATE CRAB EGG THINGS! EGGS ARE EVIL, END OF DISCUSSION!
So unfortunately, I was the Hitler of Moths and cruelly destroyed the eggs by scraping them off and hurling them out of my window. Who knows, maybe they'll land on some unsuspecting tree and grow large and strong into more gay, terrorist moths. GROSS.
... yes that was my epic story that I came online to whine about. I'm sorry. I JUST REALLY HATE INSECTS, AND EGGS, AND ANY COMBINATION OF THE TWO.
Night >_>
piss off! at 01:41 a.m.Wednesday, October 28, 2009 18 YEARS OF SUMMER
WHY IS IT SO GODDAMN HOT.
Happy birthday to Lyrad and Kevlar again~ You guys, good luck for the A's!
I seriously want an ice cream, or to learn how to swim. Or rain-summoning skills -_-
.. bye, guys.
piss off! at 04:52 p.m.Saturday, October 24, 2009 In Conclusion
Okay guys, sorry for hasty archiving earlier on. Was just clearing space for the new era of OMG-ing which shall inevitably follow.
And I foresaw a long rant. Surprisingly.. no. I don't know. Parents, eh. No big deal, I guess. That's life!
I went to Ele's place for the first time in a long time and it was awesome, although for some bizarre reason the cats were all going nuts. Maybe it's me. I am like the opposite of the Cat Whisperer. I am like the Cat Enrager.
But they used to like me! Animals generally did, which some of my LESS KIND friends took to be the clear indication of human superiority, since no sane person would trust me near their heads. Cats on the other hand, snuggle close. I like cats. I know some people don't, but I do. They're warm and furry and I kind of like that "And so?" face they give when they are being supercilious. "Humans are stupid", it says. And man sometimes I agree. LOOK we idiotically feed them and put collars on them and give them names! How is that not stupid! Cats just lounge there and think "Ha ha ha my food slaves are coming!"
(Cats are going to Rule The World someday, if nobody stops them. I am going to get on their good side now so that I get a cushy job when the DemoCats are in power. *cymbals*)
Eh I've spent a lot of time at ele's place over the years, I realise. Going there makes me think of all the random projects we've done there. And how we got high on some weird combination of grapes, peanuts (CAMEL NUTS HAHA I'M SO MATURE) and ginger beer before. What the hell were we doing, again?!?!
I think I was also drunk in her living room once, but I can't really remember that too clearly. Which either means that I've just invented this incident, or the alcohol deleted the memory. Not DRUNK drunk like hiccc slurrrr blurgh throw up, but like tipsy. I have never ever been falling-down-drunk in my life, although I am constantly falling-down-sober because apparently I produce my own alcohol. Or ecstacy. Um, something.
Suat yee thinks I have a Habit, and that it is Coffee, because I wandered over to talk to her and she could smell the coffee on me, hahaha. Look it's not my fault, some of us need to keep awake. Plus I like coffee. AND CHIA SAYS IT MINIMISES YOUR RISK OF LIVER CANCER. I THINK IT WAS THE LIVER. WHATEVER. SOMETHING LIKE THAT. SEE I AM HEALTHIER THAN YOU BECAUSE OF MY HABIT.
I don't care if I am an addict. There is too much blood in my coffee system! I need to dilute it sometimes! All the time! Every morning!
... no all of you shut up about the lack of milk and excessive caffeine stunting me, seriously ;_; NO ELE NOT EGGS NO NEVER. NO.
I don't like eggs. I think they're evil. I think they are baby chickens. Which is perfectly reasonable, as you can see, because they BLOODY WELL ARE. You would be horrified too if one happy day you attempted to cook yourself a snack and out rolled a weird, chickeny fetus. I realise that some people would just be like, Aha, extra protein!! and roll the thing into their mouths all YUM and stuff, but no. Not me. No. Yonglin the madman asked me to bring the thing to school and I was like ARE YOU INSANE, IT IS IN MY DUSTBIN.
I am re-re.. reminiscing! That is what people do when drunk. I am not drunk. I am not maudlin as a drunk, anyway, although admittedly above passages were nowhere near being maudlin. I am a retarded drunk. I laugh hysterically at everything and have to concentrate to not walk into walls.
>_> I am humming and ignoring all of you who are thinking something along the lines of "Um you are like that ALL THE TIME Wynne!" because it is a lie, and you shouldn't be so cruel, and I am very capable of walking in a straight line without smacking into things. Look, go get onto kailin's case, she's the one who walked into a signpost.
I think kailin and kaiyin are kind of similar, btw. Seriously. Niel, you wanna meet kailin? She's less.. I'm not sure how to describe it... uh... GEP I guess -___- (I'm not elitist! I mean the only other words I could think of were strange and awesome but I would be insulting one of them either way. And awerange is not a word. It sounds like orange. Strangesome sounds even worse. It sounds like a very bizarre sexual situation, like threesome but with aliens or something. So like.. okay, yeah whatever GEP it is!)But she is kind of similar at the same time. Not so insane about the monk training though, lol. Or the save-the-world thing.
Oh also right, today is the actual end of a chapter. I guess. You know... some of you who fulfill both requirements a) are close friends of mine and b) were there when it happened (this is said loosely- I simply imply a tacit understanding of the scenario and a certain level of involvement) will remember that I tried to make peace with an Ancient Enemy of mine. How nostalgic. Also how very stupid. I should just give up on people, honestly. I don't know why it always bothers me so much.
But on the other hand, I don't think we'll ever be friends and I seriously did my best! I got together a crew and we killed ourselves getting the stuff together and I'm sorry if I failed with the cake, but even my administrative powers did not extend that far -_- Long story short is, I really tried, and I did it like I would have done for a much better friend than you. And if it still wasn't enough, then I'm sorry, but I give you up. At least I know that I've tried.
I'm paranoid. By which I mean 'extremely insecure'. Meaning that sometimes I read too much into things. In this case however, multiple people have corroborated and the sources were primary sources, therefore! Okay. Fine. You still don't like me, I guess. I'll live.
Like I said, sometimes I think it's less about the actual person (especially when we are so estranged that my concept of the person is wispy at best) than about certainty. I like knowing things for sure.
I'd rather people outright say that they hate me. I'd rather people say outright that they're my friends, whatever. The point is, it's not about what you think, it's about what I know. Self-centered? Kind of, eh.
Sometimes I think it's also about the awkwardness of knowing someone through other people. Think about.. okay no, nevermind, I name no names. But there was this person I met in school, and we spoke like THAT ONCE, and then after that I couldn't figure out if we were friends, so I sort of didn't wave to her, out of sheer embarrassment. So now I ignore her all the time, because uh?? I didn't back then, so it's weird to start now?
My life is littered with stories like these. Yes yes I'm a fail human being arghhhh I'm like a robot ;___; It generally fades though! Like I get used to ignoring them, although every once in a while I remember it, and I go, oops.
Some of them hold more pull though. But then the point is that in general it bothers me a lot more than it bothers them (whoever 'they' might be), and I'm really very particular about that. It's like an infection. It only gets worse the more you scratch at it.
Like I said.. in some cases (the ones in which I barely know the person, like in the case of archenemy-- a joke btw >_> I wouldn't go so far as to call her that for real) it's more about the fact that I can't let go of things the way they are. I feel like I owe it to some kind of external force to make an effort.
So I do. Generally I leave it for birthdays, because birthdays are a good reason to talk to people. It's not so strange to wish even a person who doesn't like you happy birthday. You're just being a nice human being! So there's more leeway given to you.
... Come to think of it that is probably why so many sad saps attempt to confess on people's birthdays, which makes me think about how popular people must either seriously enjoy or seriously dread their birthdays, lol. HAHA HARRY POTTER ON VALENTINES' DAY!! >__>
But yes ANYWAY that's why I did that thing back then on her birthday. Because I thought it'd be a nice way to say I'm sorry, for whatever it was I did. Even though it failed, I'm pretty pleased with my effort.
All right. My final point is that I have finally resolved everything. I feel no more regret wrt my relationships with people. I have slowly resolved all of my issues somehow, with the last ending today.
Hahaha Ele, you said you never got the reason for my dislike of her, or my reticence to meet with her. But it wasn't always that way! Not exactly.
Back then I was just like eh no I don't know her I SHY. Now it has evolved into "No it's too freaking uncomfortable, she knows things, and so do I, and yet we've probably talked for a total of.... 1h" WHICH IS WRONG, OKAY. You need to know a person really well before you can live with knowing their weird secrets! It's like those people who think that Singapore is just some place that canes people, please. You think they want to come here???
(If they do then they are not people we actually want coming here. If you get my meaning. Hem hem.)
I know you're probably like "Aiya don't be silly" or whatever, but try and imagine it -___- people generally prefer it if the more embarrassing bits of their past are confined to close friends, y'know. That's partly why I totally refuse to speak to GZ, who was there when I was a crazy 8 year old.
Anyway, you wanted us to be friends right? At some point. So I thought I'd sms her. Um, seemed like the thing to do! I feel goodwill towards everyone on their birthday (unless I really, really hate them, in which case my generic love for people might be canceled out by the force of my ANGER) and like I said, it's not really weird to wish even people you DON'T LIKE happy birthday. If I could do that for _____'s birthday with a whole bunch of people I wasn't close to, then I guess I can manage one sms, eh. Although I admit that I waffled for a long time because I was wondering if it might be too strange? But then, Joel smsed me even though he had to get the number from someone D: I thought that was nice of him. Even though we aren't close.
So I figured, either she replies or she doesn't. If she actually replied then.. okay yay? Uh would mean things're okay then! I guess. And if she doesn't then there could be lots of reasons, ranging from wrong-number to I-am-out-of-free-smses/ I-am-so-popular-I-can't-reply-to-everyone to you're-weird-I'm-ignoring-this to I-haven't-noticed-that-it's-my-birthday-due-to-ALEVELS (not as impossible as you might think. Amazing WY managed it -___- Didn't remember until someone wished her, wth.).
So she didn't reply, but I figure that I don't care any more, because that is literally the best I can do. I mean any more would be too weird for me. Or erm probably most people, really. So yeah!
Pretty straightforward, isn't it? I like to think things through first though, to make sure it's fair and makes sense. That's why I kind of obsess over details. And actually I freak out and wonder about SOCIAL PROTOCOL very easily, which is why I'm always like omg is it too weird if I talk to so-and-so despite such-and-such??? Adhering to social protocol is important for people not to hate you -__- If, for example, someone breached social protocol and tried to interact with me for no reason, I'd be like ".... go away!" because I DON'T LIKE IT. Unless you are incredibly awesome. And that is subjective. Alternatively, you might have the biggest ego ever, like, man everyone loves me <3 in which case.. okay whatever.
It also has to do with having nobody to talk to about this sort of retarded crap-- it ends up in a place where I am ESSENTIALLY talking to myself. I realise that this is not the case, which is why you are not getting the usual "Self, what do we want for lunch?" crap that goes on inside my head. It is filtered. Barely.
Okay and yeah so that concludes this chapter in my life! I don't even care if I talk to archenemy or Chew ever again after the A's or not. I mean, I successfully evaded GZ for years (although... we are fb friends omg) once we stopped being schoolmates. That is possibly the best achievement of my life, because man was she ever a waste of space. And oxygen. And food. HEY all the food that has gone into nurturing a poop like her could've fed multiple starving African children! Who may or may not be poops too, but I mean, they've the B.O.D. whereas she's kind of QED.
.. I'm such a nerd. Okay anyway, so yeah I'm done talking. Night everyone! Btw Chia don't cut your hair lah.
piss off! at 01:23 a.m.Friday, October 23, 2009 ._.
Oh my god I'm so dead.
piss off! at 11:20 p.m.Thursday, October 22, 2009
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